Explanation

Yes, my waist is fifty inches -
Big for me because I'm short.
And yes, I like my cheddar cheese
When partnered with a vintage port.
Okay, okay, that double cream
Is always served with pud,
And cake and biscuits with my tea
Are just no bloody good
For my poor hardened arteries,
But see my point of view,
Please dear wifey if you please,
A Salad makes me spew!
I'd rather eat a bowl of air
Than crunch away on greens;
Drink water from the toilet bowl
Or nibble on my jeans!
But salad! Are you there?
You know it makes me snappy -
So let me fill my face with grub,
Stay fat, and die young happy!

Salad is Incompatible with Life. Mark R Slaughter

Just a short video on pie.

Explanation

This poem, is all about food, salad in particular. Salad according to Mark Slaughter makes him spew, now I wouldn't go that far, but he has his own opinion. Mark has a hating relationship with salad, which you can tell from many lines. "I'd rather eat a bowl of airThan crunch away on greens; Drink water from the toilet bowl Or nibble on my jeans!", is a perfect example of this behavior. The first line gives you a hint, that Mark is probably short and a little chubby, but he likes it that way and doesn't mind dying young and happy.